Domestic Violence Awareness
“She promised not to hurt me again.”
“He didn’t mean to hit me that hard.”
“They’re kids, they’ll get over it — my parents did the same thing to me.”
“If you tell anyone, I will kill you. Besides, no one will ever believe you.”
October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month and the Lycoming-Clinton Joinder Board takes abuse very seriously.
We want you to know two things:
No one deserves abuse — ever. For any reason.
We are here to help.
If you or a loved one is being harmed, call us immediately. We offer Crisis Intervention & Emergency Services 24-7.
Our Toll Free Number is 1 - 800 - 525 -7938
Local Number: (570) 326-7895
About Domestic Violence
According to the Domestic Violence Awareness Project, “Domestic violence is best understood as a pattern of abusive behaviors–including physical, sexual, and psychological attacks as well as economic coercion–used by one intimate partner against another (adult or adolescent) to gain, maintain, or regain power and control in the relationship. Abusers use of a range of tactics to frighten, terrorize, manipulate, hurt, humiliate, blame, often injure, and sometimes kill a current or former intimate partner.”
Domestic Violence — also known as Intimate Partner Violence — is a serious and widespread problem.
—> In the United States, 1 in 4 women and 1 in 9 men experience contact sexual violence,* physical violence, and/or stalking by an intimate partner in their lifetime and report negative impacts such as injury, fear, concern for safety, and needing services
*Contact sexual violence includes rape, being made to penetrate, sexual coercion, and/or unwanted sexual contact.
Domestic violence can happen to anyone regardless of age, sex, gender identity, sexual orientation, employment or educational level, race or ethnicity, religion, marital status or physical ability. However, per reported incidents, women and many racial/ethnic and sexual minority groups are disproportionately affected by domestic, or intimate partner violence.
Source: CDC https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/pdf/NISVS-StateReportBook.pdf
How to Identify Abuse
The National Domestic Violence Hotline website helps identify abuse by understanding relationship abuse, power and control, abuse and cultural context, warning signs of abuse and why people abuse.
According to The Hotline, Below are Common Signs of Abuse:
Telling you that you never do anything right.
Showing extreme jealousy of your friends or time spent away from them.
Preventing or discouraging you from spending time with friends, family members, or peers.
Insulting, demeaning, or shaming you, especially in front of other people.
Preventing you from making your own decisions, including about working or attending school.
Controlling finances in the household without discussion, including taking your money or refusing to provide money for necessary expenses.
Pressuring you to have sex or perform sexual acts you’re not comfortable with.
Pressuring you to use drugs or alcohol.
Intimidating you through threatening looks or actions.
Insulting your parenting or threatening to harm or take away your children or pets.
Intimidating you with weapons like guns, knives, bats, or mace.
Destroying your belongings or your home.
Source: National Domestic Violence Hotline, Recognize the Signs of Relationship Abuse & Common Signs of Abusive Behaviors
https://www.thehotline.org/identify-abuse/domestic-abuse-warning-signs/
Types of Abuse
There are many types of abuse, sometimes more than one is present in an abusive relationship, including:
Physical Abuse
Emotional and Verbal Abuse
Sexual Abuse
Sexual Coercion
Reproductive Coercion
Financial Abuse
Digital Abuse
Stalking
Source: https://www.thehotline.org/resources/types-of-abuse/
Drinking, Drugs and Acts of Violence
“It’s because I was drinking.”
“I don’t even remember hurting you, I’m sorry.”
“You shouldn’t have acted like that, you made me do it.”
The blame game. Abusive partners will often blame their behavior on drugs or alcohol (or things you did or said) to avoid claiming responsibility for their actions or to minimize the extent of their abuse, or try to rationalize or invent reasons for why they abuse you.
While yes, it’s true that drugs and alcohol do affect a person’s judgement and behavior, they’re never a justification for abuse.
If your partner is abusive while drinking or drugging, it’s likely that the’ll eventually become abusive while sober, too.
Source: National Domestic Violence Hotline, https://www.thehotline.org/resources/drugs-alcohol-and-abuse/
The Cycle of Abuse
How does abuse start? Often, it begins with name-calling, trying to control you, and other verbally, emotionally and/or psychologically abusive behavior.
It then escalates.
New Hope, an organization based in Massachusetts that is dedicated to ending domestic violence, shares that, “typically, the violence starts off more subtle and then grows in frequency and severity.
The cycle of abuse involves three phases, including:
Tension-Building Phase: this phase is characterized by the victim sensing tension and fearing an outburst. During this stage, the victim tries to calm the abuser down and may “walk on eggshells” to avoid any major violent confrontations.
Violent Episode: this phase is characterized by outbursts of violent, abusive incidents by the perpetrator. During this stage, the abuser attempts to dominate his/her partner with the use of violence. This phase may include physical or other types of abuse.
Reconciliation: this phase is characterized by the abusive partner showing affection or offering an apology, with the appearance of an “end” to the violence. During this stage, the perpetrator shows overwhelming feelings of remorse and sadness. Some abusers walk away from the situation, while others shower their victims with love and affection.
However, the violence does not end here. The cycle then repeats, over and over.”
Source: https://www.new-hope.org/perpetrators-of-domestic-violence/
The Long Tail of Violence
Many perpetrators of violence were once victims of violence. Per research conducted by the CDC:
“Domestic Violence is connected to other forms of violence. Experience with many other forms of violence puts people at risk for perpetrating and experiencing Domestic Violence.
Children who are exposed to Domestic Violence between their parents or caregivers are more likely to perpetrate or experience Domestic Violence, as are individuals who experience abuse and neglect as children.
Additionally, adolescents who engage in bullying or peer violence are more likely to perpetrate Domestic Violence.
Those who experience sexual violence and emotional abuse are more likely to be victims of physical Domestic Violence.
While domestic violence can happen to anyone, studies show that people with a disability have nearly double the lifetime risk of Domestic Violence victimization.
Research also suggests Domestic Violence may increase risk for suicide.
Both boys and girls who experience Teen Dating Violence are at greater risk for suicidal ideation.
Women exposed to partner violence are nearly 5 times more likely to attempt suicide as women not exposed to partner violence.
Intimate partner problems, which includes Domestic Violence, were also found to be a precipitating factor for suicide among men in a review of violent death records from 7 U.S. states.
Research also shows that experience with Domestic Violence (either perpetration or victimization) puts people at higher risk for experiencing Domestic Violence in the future.”
Furthermore:
Approximately 41% of female Domestic Violence survivors and 14% of male Domestic Violence survivors experience some form of physical injury related to their experience of relationship violence.
Other adverse health outcomes associated with Domestic Violence include a range of conditions that may effect the cardiovascular, gastrointestinal, reproductive, musculoskeletal, and nervous systems of survivors.
Many of these conditions can be chronic conditions.
Survivors of Domestic Violence may also experience depression and PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder).
And sometimes, survivors choose to cope in unhealthy ways like smoking, binge drinking and engaging in high-risk behaviors.
Domestic Violence can be fatal.
—> Approximately, 16% of murder victims are killed by an intimate partner, and over 40% of female homicide victims in the U.S. are killed by an intimate partner.
Source: https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/pdf/Domestic Violence-technicalpackages.pdf
Effects of domestic violence on children
According to the Dept. of Health and Human Services, more than 15 million children in the United States live in homes in which domestic violence has happened at least once.
There are two grave concerns when it comes to kids who witness violence and/or are victims of domestic violence.
Children who witness domestic violence or are victims of abuse themselves are at serious risk for long-term physical and mental health problems. Studies show that children who witness or are victims of emotional, physical, or sexual abuse are at higher risk for health problems as adults, including mental health issues such as depression and anxiety, low self-esteem, heart disease, obesity, and other issues.
Children who witness violence between parents may also be at greater risk of being violent in their future relationships. Unfortunately, violence can beget more violence. And children exposed to domestic violence are at greater risk for repeating the cycle as adults — sometimes entering relationships that are abusive — or conversely, becoming abusers themselves.
Source: https://www.womenshealth.gov/relationships-and-safety/domestic-violence/effects-domestic-violence-children
Remembrance & Local Help
Have you seen the purple flags lining the streets of downtown Williamsport?
This October, our local YWCA (Young Women's Christian Association) of Northcentral Pennsylvania, which operates Wise Options Program, is displaying the names and faces of people killed in Lycoming County as a result of domestic violence. The flags display the messaging, ‘We Remember.’
Wise Options helps people who are victim of domestic violence, sexual assault, human trafficking, or other violent crime. The program is devoted to “empowering victims and survivors impacted by domestic violence, sexual assault, and other violent crimes; redefining the rights of the oppressed; educating communities; and promoting peace, justice, freedom, and dignity for all.”
The YWCA operates a 24-hour crisis hotline at 1-800-326-8483.
Help is available to everyone in our community.
The Lycoming-Clinton Joinder Programs offer Services and Support to help residents in Lycoming and Clinton Counties, including:
Domestic Violence Resources
Domestic Violence Awareness Project
Lycoming-Clinton Joinder Board
National Resource Center on Domestic Violence
https://www.nrcdv.org
National Domestic Violence Hotline
YWCA Wise Options